How To Stop Mental Chatter and Calm Your Mind

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What Is Mental Chatter

“A lot of the time, our inner voice serves us well; we can work through a problem and move on,” Ethan Kross tells Inverse. If we find that we access that inner voice and we start getting stuck, it turns into chatter. Kross is a psychologist and a professor at the University of Michigan who studies emotions and self-control. He is also the author of Chatter: The Voice in Our Head, Why It Matters, and How to Harness It” (*)

Upon first reading the title of this article, the phrase “mental chatter” may sound like a somewhat familiar term that doesn’t have a specific meaning, or it may very well be completely foreign to you. In either case, this phenomenon is something that everyone experiences on a somewhat frequent basis. 

So, what is mental chatter? Well, for the purpose of this discussion, we will define it as an unorganized collection of thoughts that take up excessive mental space, causing a decrease in the ability to focus and stay grounded in the present moment. These thoughts are not necessarily positive or negative, nor are they always based on reality. 

For example, oftentimes we get so caught up in the excitement of a previous or upcoming situation that our lack of present focus causes us to miss out on important things right in front of us. 

At the same time, worry and fear can also creep into the mind and demand every ounce of the focus and concentration that is needed for the task at hand. Whether positive, negative or neutral, this mental chatter can render us unable to make the most out of the here and now. 

The world we find ourselves in today is likely the least ideal environment in terms of trying to quiet ongoing mental chatter. Not only are we faced with our own thoughts and inner dialogue, we are also constantly bombarded with stimuli from every direction begging for our attention. 

The never ending noise, flashing screens and murmur invading our eyes and ears throughout the day can make it feel almost impossible to maintain a quiet, focused mindset. 

While preventing excessive mental chatter is certainly no easy task, it is fortunately not an impossible one. For the remainder of this discussion, we are going to dive into some of the ways that mental chatter negatively affects our well-being both externally and within our own minds. 

However, as to not solely focus on the somber aspects of mental chatter, the majority of our discussion will be centered around practical ways to reduce the issue as well as the tremendous benefits of doing so. 

Ways In Which Mental Chatter Harms Our Inner Peace, Our Minds, Wellbeing, Focus And Behavior

Letting mental chatter run rampant is entirely detrimental to a healthy internal environment. There are enough sources of negativity and distraction in the external world constantly threatening your mental health as is, trying to fight this battle on two fronts simultaneously is all but impossible. 

When it comes to creating and maintaining a healthy internal environment, characterized by peace, a sense of wellbeing and the ability to focus on the present moment, mental chatter is the symbolic wrench in the gears that can quickly cause this harmonious situation to come to a grinding halt. 

The positive mental environment described above is simply not going to be maintained on any consistent basis if your energy and attention is being tugged at by a constant humming of mental chatter, regardless of whether or not it is positive or negative. 

At some point, almost everyone has experienced strictly mental exhaustion, where it just feels like the energy has been drained out of you despite a lack of any extended physical exertion. Being mentally exhausted can be every bit as debilitating as its physical counterpart. 

Without you even having to consciously perform, your mind has the responsibility of processing and trying to organize every bit of information that it is exposed to. Given the massive amount of sensory information this entails on an ongoing basis, which is quite the task. Now, add in a whopping dose of repetitive, irrelevant thoughts and mental distractions and you may find that being mentally exhausted becomes your default mode in daily life. 

The Extra Harm Which Stems From Self-Destructive Mental Chatter 

While it is true that dealing with excess mental chatter can cause issues regardless of whether it is harmful or benign in nature, self-destructive chatter poses the biggest threat. Unfortunately, a significant portion of the population today deals with this form of mental chatter on an ongoing basis. 

The usual culprits behind self-destructive mental chatter are incidents and decisions from the past that stick around in the mind to constantly remind us of why we are not good enough or worthy of whatever it is we are seeking. 

Powerful emotions like guilt and shame only grow stronger and more devastating when they are tucked away in the mind and allowed to grow uninterrupted. Similarly, an inability to get over past failures results in us viewing failure as a brick wall rather than a valuable lesson meant to allow success in future, similar situations. 

The thing with unresolved or unaddressed mental hang-ups is that they do not simply harm your own mental environment. Rather, these issues manifest themselves into the external world in the form of your relationships, lifestyle choices and interactions with peers. 

If given the chance, self-destructive mental chatter will infiltrate every facet of your life and cause a vicious cycle of negativity that affects your internal and external world in a synergistic fashion. 

As human beings, we are extremely complex beings that are composed of so many different mechanisms regarding both our physical bodies and cognitive innerworkings. These mechanisms almost never function separately from one another. 

Self-destructive mental chatter is a threat to this entire culmination of variables that dictate your enjoyment and happiness. 

Benefits Of Stopping Mental Chatter

Given the numerous threats to your mental health posed by excess mental chatter that we have discussed so far, listing the benefits of minimizing the issue becomes very clear. In fact, creating an exhaustive list of positive effects available when your mind is allowed to remain calm, positive and focused warrants an entire discussion of its own. 

Arguably the most impactful benefit is the effect that not beating yourself up mentally has on life as a whole. 

You see, every action, decision and achievement that you will ever make stems from your internal environment. The mind is the source of virtually every move you make, both physical and non-physical. With that being said, if this source is poisoned or polluted in some way, your actions that flow from it become tainted as well. 

You may have heard the saying before that “hurt people hurt people.” In addition to your own sense of fulfillment or success in your personal life, creating and nourishing healthy relationships with other people doesn’t happen if your half of the equation is toxic. 

Another remarkable change you’ll experience by minimizing mental chatter is how much more efficient and precise you become at everyday tasks. 

We are all familiar with the experience of starting a relatively simple task such as beginning to type an important email at work, only to snap back into reality 15 minutes later and realize we’ve only completed a few sentences. 

More often than not, mental chatter can be identified in this scenario as we think about the text we just sent, the cute dog walking down the sidewalk on our commute, dreading the laundry demanding to be folded when we get home. 

There are a wide variety of experiences in daily life in which a lack of focus leads to tasks taking entirely longer than they should and, even worse, the quality with which these things are completed is lacking. It should be noted, however, that rushing to get every single thing done as quickly as possible is not something to be desired. Charging full speed ahead through life has plenty of problems of its own. At the same time, time is too precious to waste excessive amounts of it on unnecessary tasks simply due to distraction. 

Reducing mental chatter and maintaining a quiet, focused mind promotes the ability to not only free up more time each day, simultaneously improve the quality in which each to-do list item is checked off. 

There are an endless number of resources out there regarding ways to reduce stress and anxiety. This is no surprise, as a population we are experiencing these things more than ever before. The other important variable in this equation, and quite the unfortunate one, is that there are equally endless sources of stress in every direction. 

Due to our ability to instantly receive and absorb information from anywhere on the planet, the potential sources of stress and anxiety reach far beyond the physical environment that we actually move about in. Rather, we are bombarded with every negative piece of information hailing from all reaches of the globe simply by glancing at a screen or checking a breaking headline notification. 

The bad news is, avoiding stressors and negative information is not going to happen assuming you aren’t planning on going off the grid for the remainder of your life. The good news, however, is that there are certainly ways to keep added stress to a minimum. 

Given that the entire subject of this conversation pertains to mental chatter, you would be correct in assuming that cutting down on it is one of these ways. By reducing the worrisome hum taking place inside your mind, the background dialogue begging to shift your attention from the place you want it to be to instead ruminate on a worry or problem that may or may not even relate to you, life becomes much more simple. 

Excessive thoughts, information and repetitive mental worries and a quiet, focused mind are mutually exclusive.

What Makes Mental Chatter Worse

An important thing to consider in the process of stopping mental chatter is to identify things that encourage the issue. While we have briefly touched on a few of these culprits, there are other catalysts that can sometimes be more discreet in the course of everyday life. This part of our discussion will highlight some things that doing (and not doing) predispose your mind to an unnecessary amount of chatter. 

Arguably one of the most prevalent habits that lead to mental chatter is a lack of effective planning. 

More specifically referring to planning the ins and outs of each day beforehand. If you wake up in the morning with only a vague idea of the things, you’ll be doing that day and little to no concept of the order in which these things need to be done, you are basically freestyling the entire day. By doing so, each and every task and objective you have throughout the day requires much more conscious thought and effort. Furthermore, frantically scrambling to remember and complete each of these tasks leads to unwarranted stress and anxiety. 

The solution to this situation is to simply plan out and create a general outline of each day on the front end. This can be as straightforward as typing a note on your phone or keeping a physical planner that you fill in each night before bed. 

Is life going to go exactly as you planned it in your daily schedule? Absolutely not. Rest assured that having a reference that allows you to even realize that something unexpected occurs in your schedule is a lot better than the entire schedule itself being unexpected. Living reactively and only planning for things the moment they present themselves is not the way to go. 

The next habit that commonly increases the amount of mental chatter you have to sift through is not possessing enough discernment between things that deserve your attention and those which do not. 

Furthermore, variables in your life that you can directly affect from those you have no decision over. Given the aforementioned bombardment of information we all get exposed to every day, we are aware of so many problems that, despite all the effort we could possibly exert, we simply cannot change. 

Understand that it is perfectly normal, even important to feel sadness and sympathy for some tragedy occurring on the other side of the world. However, allowing this to have an actual deleterious effect on how you approach your current, physical reality is a losing battle.

At the end of the day, there is nothing you can do that is going to significantly affect these unfortunate happenings. 

The category of things in which you have no power or control over includes variables much closer to home than the above example. These are the ones that are easiest to succumb to. 

Events such as getting caught in the rain, a coworker giving you the cold shoulder because they were in a bad mood before they even stepped into the office or the store you needed to go to after work closing early without your knowledge are all less than favorable things. Our initial reaction to these events is often to let them immediately shift our mood to reflect that of the situation. 

What is critical to understand, however, is that these are things in which you have literally zero control over. You did not cause it to rain, your coworker to show up mad or the local store to close. You will also not cause it to stop raining, etc. When unfortunate events that are outside of your control take place, dwelling on them only adds unnecessary mental chatter. 

Though not exclusively, life is less about what happens to us and far more about how we react to what happens to us. If you use valuable time and energy dwelling on both your own personal agenda and that of these external factors, you are simply going to create a chaotic, loud mental environment. 

Another commonly encountered promoter of mental chatter is spending time in a disorganized setting.

As we previously discussed, our external and internal circumstances are constantly interacting and affecting our overall state. When trying to encourage a quiet, focused mind, the space in which you are doing so needs to mimic this objective. 

If you attempt to remain locked in and present on whatever task is in front of you in a setting that is cluttered, messy and includes lots of distractions, it’s probably not going to happen. This external clutter competes with whatever it is you are actually doing for the attention of both your eyes and your mind. 

Think about the areas where you spend significant periods of time on a routine basis. These are places like your home, vehicle, office, etc. If you allow these settings to become messy and disorganized, the chances of adding to your mental chatter increase.

Simply put, external disorganization spills over into the mind and causes the same situation internally. 

20 Ways To Stop Mental Chatter And Quiet The Mind

Given that our discussion thus far has involved creating a working definition of mental chatter, highlighting just a few of the negative effects it can have on your daily life and some common factors that promote excessive mental chatter, we will now dive into some tangible ways to combat it. 

Listed below are 20 ways to effectively minimize the amount of mental chatter you have to deal with and reduce the noise in your mind. Some of these list items are points we have outlined briefly. Here, we will elaborate on these points as well as provide additional strategies. 

1. Don’t Start The Day In A Rush 

As we have already touched on, being rushed and in a hurry, can easily add to the noise in your mind. If you begin the day in this mode, chances are that the rest of your day will follow this trend. While we all love some extra sleep, allowing just a small amount of extra time in the mornings to prepare for the day can be very beneficial. Something as simple as waking up a half hour early can make a difference. 

2. Get Your Body Moving 

It is a lot easier for your mind to move too fast while your body is sedentary. Fortunately, the inverse of this is equally true. Engaging in physical activity in any form is a great way to silence mental noise. While your body is tasked with movement and coordination, there is less opportunity to dwell on thoughts that are irrelevant to the task at hand. 

3. Maintain A Point Of Reference

When you find yourself constantly losing focus on what you are doing, creating a symbolic point of reference to snap you back to the present can be an effective strategy. Regardless of your physical setting, identify a nearby object. 

Whenever you feel yourself start to daydream and become distracted, simply focus as hard as you can on this object for a few seconds before continuing your task. 

4. Don’t Spread Yourself Too Thin 

In the same way that feeling hurried creates mental chatter, cramming too many things on your to-do list for the day can also prevent you from staying calm and focused. We live in a society that seems to be obsessed with maximizing productivity in whatever way possible. At the same time, the actual amount of time available every day has not and will not change. 

By holding yourself accountable for too many objectives in a single 24-hour period, you only set yourself up for failure. Being productive is not an inherently bad goal. However, feeling rushed and sacrificing the quality of what you are producing simply for the sake of getting more done is counterproductive by nature. 

5. Break Things Down Into Smaller Steps 

Oftentimes when beginning a task that is time and energy-consuming, it can be easy to look at the entirety of the situation and become overwhelmed. Naturally, this leads to an increase in mental chatter. 

When you are faced with large tasks, the best first step is to assess it and then break the task down into manageable components which equate to the objective. Not only will you feel more fulfillment each time you tackle one of these smaller steps, but it will also be much easier to remain focused on quality and precision while doing so. 

6. Meditation And Mindfulness Exercises 

Research finds that mindful meditation has numerous benefits on the brain where is actually affects functional and structural changes to those areas that regulate self-awareness, emotion and attention (A translational neuroscience perspective on mindfulness meditation as a prevention strategy, Tang, et al). And that is just one study. Numerous studies and millions of practitioners around the world support the numerous benefits of meditation practice on the brain. 

Meditation and similar cognitive techniques have long been utilized for a wide variety of purposes relating to the conditioning of the mind. Mindfulness practices are a commonly used form of meditation that involves centering your entire awareness solely on the present moment. 

This usually involves focusing on bodily rhythms such as breath and heart rate or sitting quietly while taking an inventory of all the available sensations and stimuli nearby. Regardless of the exact method, mindfulness exercises are a fantastic way to reduce mental chatter. 

“When you no longer buy into your fears and worries, when you no longer overthink the past, when you no longer worry endlessly about the future — you get to experience the intoxicating silence between each thought. In this way, meditation allows the mind to finally experience itself in its truest, purest, most natural state — that of stillness.” (https://eocinstitute.org/meditation/how-mindfulness-meditation-relieves-anxious-thoughts-mind-chatter/)

7. Avoid Caffeine In The Afternoons

Without a doubt, caffeine is an absolute staple in the daily lives of most individuals. That morning cup of coffee at the start of each day can be just the boost you need to tackle whatever lies ahead. A lot of times, however, this morning cup of coffee is followed by a post-lunch cup, maybe a pre-workout energy drink, etc. 

No one is minimizing the benefit of an energy boost when fatigue hits. The problem is that consuming caffeine too late in the day means your body is still running full tilt when it comes time to unwind. 

While too much caffeine at any point in the day can cause you to become jittery and anxious, obviously not the ideal state for a quiet mind, any effective dose of it in the evenings can seriously disrupt your sleep. 

Most are familiar with the experience of lying in bed, trying to drift off before another busy day yet failing to do so because the mind just hasn’t got the memo that quitting time has come. Reducing mental chatter is an extremely important component of getting a full night’s sleep. 

If you find yourself struggling to either fall asleep at a decent time or unable to sleep through the night, the problem might originate with the timing of your caffeine intake. While the exact caffeine free period needed will vary from person to person, a decent rule of thumb is to avoid the stuff after noon. 

8. Create A Solid Sleeping Environment 

To somewhat build on our previous list item, creating an environment that is conducive to a full night of deep sleep should be a necessity. As mentioned above, lying awake in bed with a mind full of jumbled thoughts is no fun. 

Furthermore, failing to maintain a healthy sleeping pattern does not allow the brain to clean itself out as you rest and causes you to be more groggy and running on a red battery. 

There are several key components entailing what it means to create an effective sleeping environment. The first of these is ensuring the room is as dark as possible. The human eyes, when exposed to certain types of light, set into motion a chain of responses that cause the body to discontinue the production of melatonin. 

This creates a state of alertness as the body is engineered to interpret this as sunrise. Keep the room as dark by taking advantage of tools like blackout curtains. 

Another proven factor that promotes restful sleep is to make sure your room is at a fairly cool temperature. Different sources will quote varying temperatures as to what is ideal, however the point is that you should not feel like you need to pull the covers off of half your body during the night. Try cranking that thermostat down a few ticks before bed. 

Although this component will not apply universally as the last two do, implementing some sort of background noise in your sleeping environment can be a beneficial tool. We are not talking about falling asleep with the TV on or blaring the same playlist you listen to at the gym. 

Instead, some form of white noise like a box fan or electronic white noise machine can provide a gentle, recurring noise to drown out those pesky thoughts. 

9. Use Sound To Your Advantage 

Using a neutral sound such as white noise can be a useful way to prevent mental chatter outside of just bedtime. In fact, any time you find yourself in a situation where your focus is being challenged by the factors around you, throwing on a pair of headphones or earbuds and turning on white noise can save the day. There are actually countless sources of this kind of noise online that basically play on a loop for hours on end. 

Really any pair of headphones or earbuds can get the job done. If you want to take it a step further, having a pair with a noise canceling feature and still listening to white noise can make a crowded coffee shop sound like a monastery. 

10. Limit Screen Exposure 

It is unlikely that anyone is going to argue against the statement that cell phone screens are at the very top of the list regarding daily distractions. The ridiculously large amount of notifications that are pushed to our smartphones and the resulting flash of the screen catch our attention probably more than anything else. 

Even when we muster the discipline to avoid opening that latest text or notification, whatever task that we avoid opening the lock screen for is still clouded by the anticipation of checking the phone as soon as possible. 

Limiting screen exposure in the form of not only cellphones but TV screens, tablets, etc., is an important ability to grasp when it comes to reducing mental chatter. Furthermore, keeping your phone face up on your desk and attempting to simply ignore it is a battle you are not going to win. 

By far, your best bet is to either put your phone away, place it face down or place it on do not disturb. The primitive aspect of the brain simply craves the little hit of dopamine you get whenever a phone screen lights up and displays a special message intended just for you. 

11. Learn To Stop Rejecting Thoughts 

In an ironic twist, sometimes the more resistance we exert trying to silence repetitive and interruptive thoughts, the stronger they become. Keep in mind, this is not to say that the techniques being discussed are not worth utilizing. However, if your current strategy for dealing with mental chatter is using sheer willpower, putting up this fight may actually be counterproductive. 

12. Put It On Paper

Transferring your excess thoughts and mental noise onto an external medium can literally feel as if you are offloading the information from your mind. In much the same way that an external hard drive can free up storage space on your electronic device, writing things down on a consistent basis can allow much more mental clarity. 

13. Adopt A Minimalist Approach 

Similar to the way in which we discussed the importance of reducing clutter in your immediate surroundings can do the same for your mind, making a point of not accumulating too many items can also reduce mental chatter. 

The more non-essentials you have lying around to notice and constantly take inventory of, the less of a chance your mind will begin to add these visual stimuli to the background noise. 

14. Watch Fish Do Their Thing 

Yes, you read this right. Research has actually shown that aquariums exert a calming effect on the human brain. Furthermore, gazing at fish and other aquatic animals in a tank has been shown to lower heart rate and blood pressure. This is not to say that you need to turn your space into an aquarium, but still an interesting piece of information. 

15. Help Other People 

Too much mental chatter is often accompanied by feelings of loneliness and lack of connection with other people. When you do not interact with those around you enough, the mind is more than happy to pick up the conversation. Furthermore, the feeling you get by helping someone else has an overall positive effect on your mental state. 

16. Body Scanning Exercises 

Similar to mindful meditation, body scanning exercises involve focusing on one area of the body at a time and thinking about relaxing this area fully. The same practice is then repeated on the next area until it has been completed throughout. Not only can this promote rest and relaxation, the mental intention of focusing on small goals can take some of the fuel being used on mental chatter. 

17. Spend Time With A Pet

This one should come as no surprise. Pets are a well-known source of joy, affection and great at lifting our moods. All of these mental benefits provided by our furry friends can effectively provide a reprieve from an overly loud mind. 

18. Don’t Have An Overly Strict Mental Filter 

Although a different perspective from most of our discussion thus far, there are some occasions when a thought or feeling may be tugging at your attention for a reason. Human intuition is a powerful ability and should not be disregarded. 

As your work to reduce mental chatter, be careful not to create a filter that is so strong it does not allow you to address mental notifications that may exist to benefit you. 

19. Distanced Self-Talk

Distanced self-talk is a concept extensively studied by Ethan Kross, psychologist, professor at the University of Michigan who studies emotions and self-control and author of Chatter: The Voice in Our Head, Why It Matters, and How to Harness It. 

“Converging evidence indicates that distanced self-talk (i.e., using one’s own name and other non-first person pronouns to refer to the self) promotes self-control and wise reasoning.” (Distanced self-talk changes how people conceptualize the self, Gainsbourg and Kross, http://selfcontrol.psych.lsa.umich.edu/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/Gainsburg-Kross-2020-Distanced-self-talk-changes-how-people-conceptualize-the-self.pdf)

Distanced self-talk is that which separates you from the situation or task you’re navigating yourself through. When you engage in distanced self-talk, you use second or third person pronouns to put some division between yourself and what’s happening.

Distanced self-talk can help you control mental chatter. Think about the times you help a friend resolve a problem, you are likely calm, supportive and reasonable. This is in part the concept behind distanced self-talk. When you remove “I” from your own problems within your own self-talk, it reduces the amount of mental chatter you experience. 

For example:

Original self-talk thought: “I have way too much to do tomorrow, I’m not going to make it.”

The same self-talk thought using distanced self-talk: “Joe has so much to do tomorrow. What can he do to get it all done?”

A stressful situation can cause you to panic and fret, leading to an increase in mental chatter. By approaching your issue from an outsider’s perspective, you decrease the amount of panic and fret.

20. Be Sure To Challenge Your Brain 

A mind that is at rest too often will almost always find something to do. Just like the physical body, your brain needs to be exercised and challenged on a consistent basis. Whether you engage in a mental exercise specifically designed for critical thinking or just try your hand at something new, make sure that you are presenting your brain with new and unfamiliar experiences often. 

Bonus Tip: Eat Very Purposefully 

All too often we get in such a rush that even sitting down to enjoy a meal seems impossible. Even if we do avoid grabbing fast food and scarfing it down while driving with one hand and sit down at the kitchen table, our minds are everywhere else. 

Using mindful eating, making a habit of eating slowly, fully immersing yourself in the taste and texture of what you are eating can pull your sense of focus back towards the center. 

10 Ways Silence Benefits The Mind

To conclude our discussion, here are ten key points to drive home just how large a role a quiet, focused mind plays in the pursuit of both decompressing from stress and angst and maximizing the amount of mental energy one can direct towards worthwhile targets. 

1. Decreases stress and anxiety 

2. Allows more information to be processed and sorted clearly 

3. Provides the chance to assess your overall wellness

4. Gives your mind the freedom to explore creative aspects 

5. Serves as a rest button to reflect and make necessary changes moving forward 

6. Silence provides a biological response regarding the brain’s repair process 

7. Forces you to address parts of your thinking you avoid otherwise

8. Allows you to make more sound decisions, especially regarding big choices

9. Provides an opportunity to notice the small, pleasant things that often get ignored

10. Gives you a better perception of just how meaningless much of the constant noise       surrounding you at all times truly is

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Get instant access to this beautifully designed meal plan, great for weight loss and healthy eating. Includes recipe images, shopping lists, and much more.

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